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galanga
Sex Maniac
Joined: Oct 23, 2006
Posts: 162
Location: Toronto
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 Posted:
Oct 31, 2006 - 11:01 PM |
 
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I'm one of the few females in the lifestyle who prefers bareback. Everything goes faster and more intensely without the glove. But here's the funny thing about all this. Guys always boast about 'safe sex' and condom use around thier wives. But at a party, most of these guys will jump at the opportunity to go bareback when the wife's not looking. Once the guys see that I'm doing their fellow males bareback, I get a line up. It's halarious. Just before each guy goes in, he takes a quick look around to make sure his wife's not watching. |
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Yawanna
Known Trouble Maker
Joined: Aug 30, 2005
Posts: 898
Location: In Your Mind
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Nov 01, 2006 - 12:49 AM |
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| galanga wrote: | | I'm one of the few females in the lifestyle who prefers bareback. Everything goes faster and more intensely without the glove. But here's the funny thing about all this. Guys always boast about 'safe sex' and condom use around thier wives. But at a party, most of these guys will jump at the opportunity to go bareback when the wife's not looking. Once the guys see that I'm doing their fellow males bareback, I get a line up. It's halarious. Just before each guy goes in, he takes a quick look around to make sure his wife's not watching. |
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couple4u
Insatiable
Joined: Dec 03, 2004
Posts: 5318
Location: oakville
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Nov 01, 2006 - 01:39 AM |
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Galanga...please tell me your not serious! |
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Sandra
Verified Couple
Joined: Oct 03, 1999
Posts: 7596
Location: Toronto
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Nov 01, 2006 - 01:52 AM |
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Holy crap.
Even the thought that people in the lifestyle would go bareback scares the bejebus out of me.
How stupid can you get, woman?
It's not just a question of AIDS/HIV. There are all kinds of other sexually transmitted shit you can get by doing that. And by doing it with a "lineup of males" as you describe.....well....good luck sister. If they are OK doing it with you chances are they have done it with others bareback as well. It's just a matter of time..........
I still can't beleive how ignorant that is . And to say that the wife has no knowledge is doubly ignorant. The lifestyle is about respect. Your blatant disrespect of what the wife isn't going to see or find out casts you in a light that is not too bright. |
_________________
"In a world full of caterpillars, it takes balls to be a butterfly." |
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Sexy Couple
Slut Puppy
Joined: Oct 03, 1999
Posts: 960
Location: GTA Ont Can
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Nov 01, 2006 - 03:23 AM |
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Yeah ...
Right ...
Gotta be an Aglia or a Black Fury!  |
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crazycouple4u
Sex Maniac
Joined: Jul 02, 2006
Posts: 161
Location: Brantford
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Nov 01, 2006 - 03:24 AM |
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That would be one of my biggest fears - what was that in before me????!!!! If my husband wasn't willing to tell me that he was just getting it on with so and so without protection - what else wouldn't he be telling me......?
And I'd cut his pee pee off if he brought something home with him that changed my life forever!
It seems to be all about respect and honesty - and if a couple can't share that then what the hell are they doing together????!!!!
This is just my view.....
Mrs. CC4U
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funcupp
Slut Puppy
Joined: Oct 16, 2005
Posts: 725
Location: Milton
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Nov 01, 2006 - 03:40 AM |
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Well said CC4U !!
And pretty scary shit galanga |
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Ruthy
Verified Couple
Joined: May 09, 2001
Posts: 4148
Location: Toronto
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Nov 01, 2006 - 03:41 AM |
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We actually discovered a woman with that same attitude at one of our parties a few months ago.
She is no longer welcome at HH private on-premise parties. |
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Stay Happy
Ruthy |
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Longing
Verified Couple
Joined: Jun 19, 2003
Posts: 805
Location: Toronto
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Nov 01, 2006 - 04:31 AM |
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Appropriate this post came along on Halloween.......cause that kind of activity in the lifestyle is VERY SCARY!!!!
Ruthy - it's good to know that HH watches out for its patrons at their on premise parties. Everone should be vigilant about this kind of thing - but having the support of the organizers is a very reassuring thing.
galanga........read the posts that your comment raised...then read them again........and learn. |
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Longing
"The most exciting, challenging and significant relationship of all is the one you have with yourself. And if you find someone to love the you YOU love, well, that's just fabulous." |
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ztop
Sex Fiend
Joined: Nov 11, 2004
Posts: 47
Location: GTA
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Nov 01, 2006 - 06:01 AM |
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Oh my god............what are you crazy........Galanga.........you see its people like you that screw it up for everyone |
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Hard_Drive
Insatiable
Joined: Dec 30, 2005
Posts: 1755
Location: Toronto
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Nov 01, 2006 - 06:12 AM |
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Hmmmm.....how does the saying go....one bad apple....can scare the shit out of everyone else.
If you want to play bare-back..... do it in a closed circle......that's where everybody gets tested (with paper proof) including the window of opportunity & doesn't do anyone else out of the circle (of course the bigger the circle the better).
You know what really turns me on.........knowing that I won't catch anything afterwards ...............the lifestyle is all about fun.........not worry
Please remember that
Women control what goes on in this sandbox........so don't break the rules just because you can....because an opportunity presents itself
I hope this was just a GOTCHA on your part for Halloween...kinda saying BOO.........not a fact
We encourage honesty but DEMAND RESPONSIBILITY in a Hedonistic lifestyle....by one and all....that's how this lifestyle can thrive & grow |
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nottymilf
Sex Fiend
Joined: May 20, 2006
Posts: 60
Location: Toronto
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Nov 01, 2006 - 01:51 PM |
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While I agree that playing bareback in the lifestyle isnt responsible, before we all jump on Galanga (pardon pun) remember it takes two! What about all those men who line up and eagerly go for it?
Hard_Drive even it a woman chooses to break the rules, does that mean her male partner is incapable of acting responsibly? Is it expecting too much for men to follow the "no glove no love" rule regardless of a woman's willingness?
The responsiblity rests with each individual male and female. |
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Wilderness
Verified Couple
Joined: Jan 11, 2006
Posts: 3149
Location: Toronto
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Nov 01, 2006 - 02:50 PM |
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While I agree that Galanga's post shows a scarier, risky and darker side of the lifestyle, I also think that there are more people out there than would come on here and admit it, that do fuck without protection...We have seen it, well, I have, cause the Mrs don't see shit past 3 feet  ... We have had several people proposition us online and in person, and throughout the meet and greet process, they have openly declared that they prefer bareback...well who doesn't prefer it? But what keeps us safe is the thought about "what if" and what are we prepared to suffer through or make our kids suffer through for for the rest of our lives for some adult fun? I think it happens alot more than people will admit...So I think some of you may have been a tad harsh with Galanga!
And I think Notty hit on something big here too. It is the women who control this ultimately, but the men are the one's lining up for a shot at a woman who will let them in...I am curious, HD likes experiments! I am going to start a thread with a poll and see what the anonymous public has to say about this topic!
Let he who is without sin, cast the first stone! |
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"Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter...and those who matter don't mind." -Dr. Seuss- |
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Wilderness
Verified Couple
Joined: Jan 11, 2006
Posts: 3149
Location: Toronto
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Nov 01, 2006 - 03:04 PM |
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Might I add that Nottymilf is quite hot!!! |
_________________
"Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter...and those who matter don't mind." -Dr. Seuss-
Last edited by Wilderness on Nov 01, 2006 - 08:37 PM; edited 1 time in total |
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bookworm
Newbie
Joined: Aug 04, 2006
Posts: 10
Location: Mississauga
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Nov 01, 2006 - 03:23 PM |
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I read Galanga's post 10 times now, and I still can't find the part where she holds a gun to the man's head and orders him to remove the condom. Longing asks Galanga to learn from the other posters. Learn what? What I’ve learned from those posts is that the antiquated way of thinking that women have put up with for centuries is still alive and well. In the minds of those posters it is the woman’s fault. Ruthy (for whom I have the highest respect) points out that women with a ‘sneaky’ attitude are not welcome at HH parties, but never mentions any barring of ‘sneaky’ men. Again, when in doubt blame the woman. Case in point – this thread was started by a MAN who admits that he encourages his wife to take other men’s ejaculate vaginally so he can lap it up. And Galanga was the third poster. The second was another MAN who agreed with the first. Yet, every single response that followed dumped on Galanga. This kind of thinking goes back to antiquity. Adam ate the apple and Eve got the blame.
But the most disturbing response was from Sandra. She makes a point of Galanga’s disrespect for the men’s wives. Sandra, if I’m not mistaken, HE is the one with the commitment to his wife, not Galanga. If he can’t keep his promises to his own wife, why are you blaming a woman who has nothing to do with those promises? I remember a time when rape victims were scrutinized for what they were wearing at the time of the rape. Why? Because, although I (and I’m sure Sandra) believe 100% of the blame is on the rapist, there are many people who think some blame should still go to the woman. Sandra goes on to correctly point out that unprotected vaginal sex is dangerous with respect to STDs. However, she makes no mention of the dangers of unprotected oral sex, something that is rampant in the swinger community. Let’s go down the list of what you can catch from oral sex – herpes, gonorrhea, Chlamydia, hepatitis, UTI, and, indeed HIV. But when was the last time you saw a man perform oral sex at an HH party using an oral dam? Or a woman give a blowjob through a condom? I’m not sure where Sandra got her medical degree from, but to call Galanga ‘stupid’, ‘ignorant’, and ‘not too bright’, is not only medically incorrect, but the name calling is pure hypocrisy . Anyone who thinks oral sex is any safer than vaginal sex is delusional.
But all this might be moot. Galanga never actually says she is unsafe. She merely says she allows men ‘bareback’. That means THEY don’t wear a condom. Galanga in a previous post mentioned that she uses female condoms. I don’t know if she does or not, but if she does, then I know what she means by the word ‘hilarious’ in this post. It must be hilarious to watch these men THINK that they’re being sneaky on their wives when she knows they’re really not. |
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xperimenter
Verified Couple
Joined: Jul 25, 2005
Posts: 707
Location: Etobicoke
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| Posted:
Nov 01, 2006 - 03:36 PM |
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| bookworm wrote: | Let’s go down the list of what you can catch from oral sex – herpes, gonorrhea, Chlamydia, hepatitis, UTI, and, indeed HIV.
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Yeah, you can even catch a mouthful from unprotected oral sex...
You make it sound, for the purpose of making your point, that it's the same. The risks of catching these from oral sex (except maybe herpes... But then, I wouldn't even kiss someone with a cold sore) are much, much slimmer than from unprotected intercourse.
| bookworm wrote: | | I’m not sure where Sandra got her medical degree from, but to call Galanga ‘stupid’, ‘ignorant’, and ‘not too bright’, is not only medically incorrect |
Note to all, please be advised that only MDs are qualified to accurately insult someone. 
| bookworm wrote: | | Anyone who thinks oral sex is any safer than vaginal sex is delusional. |
Been reading much lately?  |
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Hard_Drive
Insatiable
Joined: Dec 30, 2005
Posts: 1755
Location: Toronto
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Nov 01, 2006 - 03:50 PM |
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As I wait here to leave for Torture Land (physio) the last time we risked our health was in January 1992.....and that was still within a closed circle.....but the group had not yet decided on insisting on "paperwork" & window periods.
A call came mid week from one couple we had known for 5 years that they had seen a doctor & had contracted "crabs" somehow & advised us to see a doctor (just in case....because of the group party that week-end).
I know a bout of crabs is not serious........but at the time the "not knowing" until we saw a doctor to give us a clean bill of health......was something we vowed would never happen again.
These were close friends....they called.....they were upfront about it.....what if they were "no names" & never had the sense of responsibilty.
That marked the day for new rules. We were lucky....at the time my SO had a landing strip & I was "neat".
My SO was so upset at the Doctor's that she demanded the presciption for the shampoo regardless........those scarey words dirtied her mind (& not in a good way) she had to do "something" ....words of comfort from a Doctor were not enough.
Playing safe is the only way it works for us.
We never even want to risk WHAT IF.....it's not worth it.
When our group met for a sit-down the next week ....you should have seen the scared looks on many faces......as it turned out ....the couple who contracted the crabs did so (pretty sure) at a motel the following day trying to live out a fantasy scene we all spoke about in role-play......that's when we found out that Motels who don't keep up high samitary standards .....their beds can harbour these nasty critters for a couple of days before they die off from lack of feeding on blood.
So make sure the sheets you play on have been run through bleach & very hot water........BRING YOUR OWN SHEETS ....is one step safer |
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Sexy Couple
Slut Puppy
Joined: Oct 03, 1999
Posts: 960
Location: GTA Ont Can
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Nov 01, 2006 - 04:35 PM |
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| Sexy Couple wrote: | | ... Gotta be an Aglia or a Black Fury! ... |
Nobody got it, eh?
Props to the instigators.
Come ON! This isn't real world thinking!
What benefit could starting a thread … with subject matter so extreme … possibly have but to instigate heated discussion … a verbal fist fight. It worked!
Well done, but … pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeease! This is insulting! |
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xperimenter
Verified Couple
Joined: Jul 25, 2005
Posts: 707
Location: Etobicoke
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Nov 01, 2006 - 04:44 PM |
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| Sexy Couple wrote: | | Sexy Couple wrote: | | ... Gotta be an Aglia or a Black Fury! ... |
Nobody got it, eh?
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I didn't. But then, I'm one of those who comfortably eats animals that weren't killed by me. 
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Furby
Slut Puppy
Joined: Dec 16, 2005
Posts: 892
Location: Location...Unknown
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Nov 01, 2006 - 05:19 PM |
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| Quote: | Come ON! This isn't real world thinking!
What benefit could starting a thread … with subject matter so extreme … possibly have but to instigate heated discussion … a verbal fist fight. |
I felt the same thing sexy couple  |
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Save the last dance for me! |
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Ruthy
Verified Couple
Joined: May 09, 2001
Posts: 4148
Location: Toronto
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Nov 01, 2006 - 05:49 PM |
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bookworm,
Yes, it's never one-sided. It takes two to make someting happen or not happen.
When it comes to sex, it seems that for many men their headss are solely focused on sex.
Perhaps as women we are wired differently, but I've found many women more aware of their surroundings than men are during sex. If that is true or even remotely possible, then why not take the responsibility as women to not tempt man with such forbidden fruits. 
At HH, we provide an environment of safe & comfortable sex. By condoning a woman to demand sex from men by bareback fashion is disresptful to our guests. Just because the man will rise to the bait doesn't mean that we can turn our heads & walk the other way.
Who are any of us to judge anyone? Thanks |
_________________
Stay Happy
Ruthy |
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Sandra
Verified Couple
Joined: Oct 03, 1999
Posts: 7596
Location: Toronto
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| Posted:
Nov 01, 2006 - 08:14 PM |
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I've split and moved the bulk of this conversation from the original post it appeared in (Cream Pies) to this one since it was way off topic from what the first poster was asking in that Cream Pie thread. |
_________________
"In a world full of caterpillars, it takes balls to be a butterfly." |
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taktow
Verified Couple
Joined: Oct 13, 2004
Posts: 360
Location: GTA
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Nov 01, 2006 - 10:43 PM |
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This is the kind of stuff to scare people right out of the lifestyle. It does not at all surprise me that there are couples who do this sort of thing without protection. Just furthers our belief that you have to be very careful who you choose to play with. You might trust a couple (or a single), but can you trust all the others they have been with? Makes people "new" to the lifestyle very attractive (and even with them we would still insist on safe sex). It also makes married singles more attractive - they have more at stake in that they do not want to "bring something home" to their non-partcipating spouse.
I, too, am surprised at the "blame" being put on the ladies allowing bareback. What about the men (especially the married ones who do it bareback without their wife's knowledge)? Come on, we need to expect the same responsible behaviour from them as we do from the ladies. And everyone thinks the women control this lifestyle? Seems to me the men are getting what they want..........and even getting a little "more" of what they want by hiding some things from their spouse. I've always believed the men control the lifestyle. They just paint things in such a way to make the ladies believe they are always holding the reigns. (Makes things easier for them!) I could point out more than one thread over the last few months that proves that point. However, that is another topic, probably not worth delving in to.
Play safe, or only play with each other. It's the only way to go. |
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couple4u
Insatiable
Joined: Dec 03, 2004
Posts: 5318
Location: oakville
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| Posted:
Nov 01, 2006 - 10:54 PM |
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When you look at the pole the numbers are fairly even to those who will not bare back, to those who have at least done bare back while swinging. That shocks the hell out of me! |
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Ruthy
Verified Couple
Joined: May 09, 2001
Posts: 4148
Location: Toronto
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| Posted:
Nov 02, 2006 - 05:10 PM |
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couple4u,
Remember that it's also how you do it. |
_________________
Stay Happy
Ruthy |
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crazycouple4u
Sex Maniac
Joined: Jul 02, 2006
Posts: 161
Location: Brantford
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Nov 03, 2006 - 01:36 PM |
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I personally dont think it has anything to do with going bareback, but more of the fact that the men that galanga, is referring to are disrepecting their partners rules or guidelines. When a couple sets down rules and guidelines that say sex with a condom is a rule, then either the women or men decide to go without one, is completely disrespecting their partner wishes. This is wrong on so many levels. The position you put yourself if my chance you catch something is not worth the consequences which still isnt the point. I believe if you have to sneak around your partners back to do anything with another person which is against you and your partners set rules and guidelines is so dishonest. That if you are at a point in your relationship that you have chosen to be in the lifestyle you would think that you could be honest with your partner. There are to many negitive consequences that can come out of this, not just the health aspect, but also losing the trust of you partner. Where do you go from there.
The feeling of distrust is not something you want to feel being in this lifesytle, i dont think it will lead you to a very happy life at all. I believe that is our goal bein gin this lifesytle is to fulfill desire of the self and to achieve another level of happiness. We all search for our on paths but when your path includes more then just yourself, one would hope to believe to not only guide them but let them guide you.
Again this is just my opinion, not sure if it makes any sense at all.
Happy posting
Let the force me with you , lol
h of CC4U |
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Wilderness
Verified Couple
Joined: Jan 11, 2006
Posts: 3149
Location: Toronto
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Nov 08, 2006 - 07:10 PM |
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There are several explanations for this Barrie...
1/ Mob mentality...When you see riots start and suddenly average joe citizens in suits and ties start pulling TV's out of stores, or bypassers out of their vehicles to beat on...it doesn't mean it is a good idea, but hell, everyone seems pretty comfy doing it, so why not!
2/ Follow the leader...One guy or gal decides that bareback is a good idea, and the rest in the room just blindly follow suit because nobody is saying not too, and of course it feels better! You can bet there were some heated conversations between some husbands and wives...or they didn't bring it up at all!
This poll is anonymous, as are in some cases the names on this board...Being able to vote or state that you are for bareback here, does not mean that you will be willing to stand up in a room full of adults and say the same thing! I bet if you took all of those that voted option 3, 4 or 5 and put those people in a room and asked them to vote live, the answers would be much different! |
_________________
"Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter...and those who matter don't mind." -Dr. Seuss- |
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Sandra
Verified Couple
Joined: Oct 03, 1999
Posts: 7596
Location: Toronto
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Nov 08, 2006 - 09:32 PM |
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Just because people play in the same closed circles is no guarantee at all.
Example....
Mr. Bareback says he is fine and that he and the Mrs. only play with a certain group of people.
What is not known to him or those they are playing with is that Mrs. Bareback has been barebacking behind his back.
Could happen with the Mr. as well.
Get the picture? |
_________________
"In a world full of caterpillars, it takes balls to be a butterfly." |
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Wilderness
Verified Couple
Joined: Jan 11, 2006
Posts: 3149
Location: Toronto
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Nov 08, 2006 - 09:52 PM |
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| Barriecutieguy wrote: | | Would the answer be honest or dishonest live? |
I would think that people that ride bareback would be less inclined to admit in the open, as they would suddenly become suspect to those that believe safe sex is the way to go!! You see the types of reactions that people here had to Galanga...Playing safe is the way to go Barrie... |
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"Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter...and those who matter don't mind." -Dr. Seuss- |
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Hard_Drive
Insatiable
Joined: Dec 30, 2005
Posts: 1755
Location: Toronto
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Nov 09, 2006 - 07:43 AM |
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Barrie......guys can relate to sports......think of a player in the NFL or NHL playing without equipment to protect themselves from injury.......eventually you'll get creamed & it may finish off your career permanently.....I know...I know....wearing a helmet doesn't give the girls in the stands a chance to see what your head looks like....but they can see the moves of a star....cause that's obvious
If you have ever played a contact sport in your life....I'm sure you've never gone without putting on "the cup" to protect the family jewels.
This one is made of latex |
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Gary_Joy_CPL
Sex Fiend
Joined: Oct 29, 2006
Posts: 70
Location: Oshawa
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Nov 15, 2006 - 07:49 PM |
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Its kind of like this with us.
I made a commitment to the wife that I would only go bareback with her and lamb chop. That way it makes my wife feel special and she knows that lamb chop is faithful to me.
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The greatest resource to posses is that of an open mind |
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Wilderness
Verified Couple
Joined: Jan 11, 2006
Posts: 3149
Location: Toronto
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Nov 15, 2006 - 09:02 PM |
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So you eat rats and fuck sheep! You will fit right in here!!  |
_________________
"Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter...and those who matter don't mind." -Dr. Seuss- |
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